July 25, 26, 27 Storms, Storms, Storms

Well we are finally back online. Due to the storms and such all of our computers went crazy.

Lizzy has been screaming, whinning, not talking much and just plain difficult. It is impacting everyone in the house. We are all getting punchy.

She went outside for a bit and played with the hose. It took about 30 minutes for her to ask to go out instead of standing at the front door screaming. I would not let her go outside until she stopped. This screaming is out of control. She does it for everything.

Last night she was up most of the night screaming and being very hyper. she finally gave up at 6am. Boy are we going backwards again! Hopefully, this old stuff will lessen soon.

Her noise sensitivity is a tad better but everything else is terrible. Everything is so intense with her. Not mention, everyone in the house is tense.

This is the kind of stuff that most people do not realize about autism. It is a condition that impacts everyone around that person.   What else can we do? We are doing everything possible but still it is a hard road. This is true for anyone who has an ill loved one. It slowly breaks you down. Hopefully it will break down the old person and leave room for a new birth. The birth of better and stronger people who will have learned a great deal from the storms of life. This is our goal. Honestly, today I am not finding much comfort, my emotions have wrestled my logic straight to the ground and it is pinned to the mat.

I can’t give in to it. WE must keep going and ride the storm. Oh the storms! The electrical storms we had killed our computers that we use for communication. Lizzy’s communication has also been stifled by the regressive autism storm.

Storms always mean change. In movies it is used all of the time. Rain, thunderstorms, always mean a shift with the character that is being shown. Change is on the horizon I know that. Sometimes it’s just plain difficult to remember it.

Through the grace of God it will end soon and we will  be given the strength to keep going.  We are so tired. Our hearts, our minds. We have been through the ringer the last month or so. What else can we do but go on? We must persevere and have faith. What else would we do for someone who we love so much?

Tomorrow is a new day and another chance. This is what I hold on to, and teach my kids to do also. Especially, Ian, Amelia and Martin they are at an age where they are seeing that life is not easy. Like I tell them, “If someone is telling you life is easy, they are trying to sell you something”. Yes life is full of wonderful happy moments but there are also flat tires, sick dogs, broken limbs and broken hearts. It is all part of the journey.

So, I am going to make some organic popcorn and organic chocolate milk and try to comfort the entire tribe. Including the female chief.

Sweet dreams to all.