Lizzy woke up around 10: 45 and was moody. She did not want to be changed or get dressed. She is starting to dip again. I think the CCC mistake was not problematic at all. But, my observations have been that the Cuprum does more for her. Her attitude and mood was much better. So I ask myself was it the CCC or the Hep B 10M?
Dori wants to wait and see what happens today and Friday, that way we know which way to go.
Today my angels of mercy helped tremendously so I could keep my feet up as needed. What an awesome bunch they are! Thanks guys, I could not do it without you! xo
I came downstairs, and was suddenly overwhelmed by a tidal wave of tears. I went up to Lizzy and realized that she had messed her Pull-Up.
I took her by the hand and said “You need to be changed!”
How many times have I said that before without even being aware of it? Too many to count.
The words hit me like a ton of bricks. I began to sob. Lizzy noticed and put her little hands on my eyes and said “Put it back”.
Oh please, could I cry any harder? I doubt it. As I write this now my jaws and teeth still ache.
As I wiped my face and hugged her I realized that I do not want to change who she is. I just want her to be happy and without discomfort. Don’t we want that for all of the one’s we love?
The big difference for me is, does she comprehend when I try to tell her things? Well today the answer was yes. It wasn’t when I thought she should talk but when I needed it most. Thank you God for the reminder and hope.
Big bro Martin was helping with Lizzy today and I remembered that this handsome guy asked me last week.
“I wonder what our lives would be like if Lizzy wasn’t autistic? I think every one of us would be different. I know I would be. Poor baby, I just want her to get better.”
Being 14 years old I thought it was beautiful that he thinks of his baby sister and wants the best for her. Again, thank you God for using someone I love to show me the way. Never ceases to amaze me.
Lizzy had her Hep B 10M at 6pm and as of 8:50pm no signs. My guess it will hit later. Maybe we will have an easy night or not. Either way, I feel strong enough to deal with it. Today was an eye opener.
Yesterday Ian and I went out to lunch to talk about teenage stuff and I saw these flowers right outside the door. Now this restaurant is nothing fancy by any means, and we stopped there because it was close. Again, reminders and hope. Sunflowers are Todd’s favorite flower and mine is Black Eyed Susans. And there they are right next to each other. It is amazing what one can see when their eyes are open to God’s gifts. I hope my vision is in the proper focus everyday.
Good Night and Sweet Dreams!